The weather has been a little unusual lately. Typically, once May arrives, there is little rain in the Bay until Novemberish. While the rain is good for our reservoirs, it's not so great for practices at night.
We've had some nasty practices in the rain this year. At one practice, my hands were so cold I couldn't take off my shoes and simply drove home wearing all of my wet clothes with the heater on full blast.
Thus, when the rain came again this week, one of my teammates shows up with water-proof pants pulled up to her knees.
"Those kinda look like old school basketball shorts," says one of my teammates.
"What?" I ask.
"Well, for you, they aren't so old school," she says in reference to my rapidly approaching 40th birthday.
I laughed...well, sorta.
We then somehow got on the subject of the sportswear of the past.
"It was horrible in the 80's...shorts were way too tight," I state.
"What do you mean?" asks one of my many lesbian teammates.
"You could see everything."
"What?"
At this point I realize I am talking about men's fashion...not women's fashion. The male past blows in on a gust of wind. I try to recover.
"You could see their package...it was just gross. Women's fashion was just fine...well, except for the collared shirts and the poofy hair."
Hopefully my little stray into men's fashion didn't trigger any suspicion, but simply makes her think I was more into boys in my past.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Buttons
My coworker and I were both headed downstairs to the receiving dock. As we approached, he, like many others I have seen, pressed the handicap button that opens the double doors leading into the area.
"Why do so many people have to press that button when they could easily open the door themselves?" I asked.
"I like having doors magically open for me."
"I have doors opened for me all of the time."
"Yeah, but that's because you have breasts. It's no fair."
A little crude, but I still laughed...and, of course, then we briefly discussed the fairness of it all.
"Why do so many people have to press that button when they could easily open the door themselves?" I asked.
"I like having doors magically open for me."
"I have doors opened for me all of the time."
"Yeah, but that's because you have breasts. It's no fair."
A little crude, but I still laughed...and, of course, then we briefly discussed the fairness of it all.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Boxers or Briefs
So, a number of my teammates love to wear boxers. I'm not exactly sure why, but they love them. Of course, a number of lesbian women also love to wear boxers, and since a good proportion of my teammates are lesbians, it figures that a healthy number of them would prefer boxers.
After a few of us had brunch in the Castro, we walked along Market on our way to another destination. Somehow we got on the conversation of underwear, and my teammate walking closest to me says she wears boxers. I ask her why so many of our teammates wear boxers. What does it do for them? Men wear them because it is supposedly healthier for sperm, but what does it do for girls?
She said she just liked wearing them and that she found comfort in them. She said her mother didn't quite understand but just kinda accepted it.
"I'm not one of those transgender, I just like wearing boxers," she said, reinforcing her diverse gender expression. "I mean, I like wearing masculine clothes, and I love my bra. I just love my boobies."
"Hmmm...you're a cross-dresser," I said jokingly.
"Haha! Yeah, I guess I am."
After a few of us had brunch in the Castro, we walked along Market on our way to another destination. Somehow we got on the conversation of underwear, and my teammate walking closest to me says she wears boxers. I ask her why so many of our teammates wear boxers. What does it do for them? Men wear them because it is supposedly healthier for sperm, but what does it do for girls?
She said she just liked wearing them and that she found comfort in them. She said her mother didn't quite understand but just kinda accepted it.
"I'm not one of those transgender, I just like wearing boxers," she said, reinforcing her diverse gender expression. "I mean, I like wearing masculine clothes, and I love my bra. I just love my boobies."
"Hmmm...you're a cross-dresser," I said jokingly.
"Haha! Yeah, I guess I am."
San Francisco Student Survey Report
A few months ago, I caught an article about a survey on San Francisco LGBT students. This survey basically asked students about their sexual orientation and gender identity, along with a number of questions concerning their social interactions.
The report is quite eye-opening, and I'm surprised that it didn't receive more national recognition. It reports, based on student surveys, that approximately 12% of students have seriously considered suicide while more than twice (27%) of the lesbian, gay, or bi students have. Double that percentage again (54%), and you get the number of transgender students that have seriously considered suicide. That number is just astounding, and shows just how hard transgender students can have it...and we're talking just San Francisco schools...not somewhere out in the middle of a red state. This is about San Francisco students!
When I talk on LGBT panels, I usually quote the fact that queer youth have basically double the suicide rate of non-queer youth, and that trans-youth have a higher percentage than the queer youth. This number is amazing, though, that basically half of transgender youth have seriously considered suicide. Now, while no one can confirm suicide rates for trans and queer youth simply because often times we don't know why people kill themselves, this report gives solid numbers to something many have been saying for a long time. It's not easy being queer or trans, and most of time the pressure comes from their peers or family.
Another section talks about how safe the students feel at school. Seven percent of hetero-students have skipped school because they felt unsafe. The number jumps up to 11 percent for LGB students and an amazing 56 percent for transgender students that say they have stayed away from school because of fears for their safety.
One of the biggest things I have seen recently is the push for people not to use "That's so gay", which can and does affect queer and trans-youth. I've seen all types of people use that phrase, and in many situations, it is harmful to queer and trans-youth because it encourages verbal bullying. The hardest part is that people say this without even realizing the harm they are creating...and it's basically spread as a socially accepted phrase in our society.
When I talk on the panels (and if there is time), I like to discuss how best to be a queer or trans ally. One of the best ways, I tell them, is to just create conversation and dialogue about the panel discussion.
I would say, "Go home and tell your parents, family, or friends about the interesting people and topics that we discussed tonight. And be there with open arms should anyone ever need to talk about anything. Tell them you'll be there to listen and not judge."
One at a time, we can make a huge difference in this world.
The full San Francisco Unified School District report
The report is quite eye-opening, and I'm surprised that it didn't receive more national recognition. It reports, based on student surveys, that approximately 12% of students have seriously considered suicide while more than twice (27%) of the lesbian, gay, or bi students have. Double that percentage again (54%), and you get the number of transgender students that have seriously considered suicide. That number is just astounding, and shows just how hard transgender students can have it...and we're talking just San Francisco schools...not somewhere out in the middle of a red state. This is about San Francisco students!
When I talk on LGBT panels, I usually quote the fact that queer youth have basically double the suicide rate of non-queer youth, and that trans-youth have a higher percentage than the queer youth. This number is amazing, though, that basically half of transgender youth have seriously considered suicide. Now, while no one can confirm suicide rates for trans and queer youth simply because often times we don't know why people kill themselves, this report gives solid numbers to something many have been saying for a long time. It's not easy being queer or trans, and most of time the pressure comes from their peers or family.
Another section talks about how safe the students feel at school. Seven percent of hetero-students have skipped school because they felt unsafe. The number jumps up to 11 percent for LGB students and an amazing 56 percent for transgender students that say they have stayed away from school because of fears for their safety.
One of the biggest things I have seen recently is the push for people not to use "That's so gay", which can and does affect queer and trans-youth. I've seen all types of people use that phrase, and in many situations, it is harmful to queer and trans-youth because it encourages verbal bullying. The hardest part is that people say this without even realizing the harm they are creating...and it's basically spread as a socially accepted phrase in our society.
When I talk on the panels (and if there is time), I like to discuss how best to be a queer or trans ally. One of the best ways, I tell them, is to just create conversation and dialogue about the panel discussion.
I would say, "Go home and tell your parents, family, or friends about the interesting people and topics that we discussed tonight. And be there with open arms should anyone ever need to talk about anything. Tell them you'll be there to listen and not judge."
One at a time, we can make a huge difference in this world.
The full San Francisco Unified School District report
Thursday, April 01, 2010
The End (April Fools)
After much thought and deliberation, I've decided to discontinue the blog and remove all content. I figure it's time for me to move on with whatever else there is in life and let the next generation blog about their experiences. May the future treat them well!
Monday, March 29, 2010
Low expectations
Ever since I started confronting my gender issues in the early 2000's, I have had a keen eye on all things transgender. I don't think I was as aware before transition, especially while the internet was still developing.
One thing I have noticed is that whenever a transgender person makes something of themselves and enters the public eye, they end up getting slapped with the trans label. Instead of being the female golfer, or the female mountain biker, or the female appointed to the Commerce Department by President Obama, they end up being labeled as the transgender golfer, the transgender mountain biker, or the transgender woman appointed to the Commerce Department. And, of course, I'm using the more polite adjectives.
It's almost as though we're not expected to do anything with our lives, and then when we do, they label us as though to say that we either don't belong there or to remind people that we should be thrown back to the gutter.
This made me wonder if one could be famous without the whole T thing coming out? And if so, how famous could one be without it being an issue? Sure, there is the super stealth scenario, but someone somewhere likely still knows.
And is that fear of being outed a hindrance for transgender people? Are we afraid to be too good simply because all of the attention might out us? Do we fear going in front of TV cameras or appearing in newspapers for fear that someone might see us and go, "Hey, there's that girl who used to be a boy."
Or are we afraid of our own "community"?
A former teammate of mine transitioned, and when we met in a bar a number of months after his transition, he approached me and asked if I was MTF. He'd found out via some sort of grapevine...a grapevine probably throughout the T community.
Are we our own worst enemies? Will we out one another to our friends, family, or coworkers just to say, "Hey, I know her...she's a transsexual, too" just to provide justification to the success transgender people can obtain. Or are we just too fragile to believe that it's OK for other transgender people to know there are others out there who can make a name for themselves and be highly successful at what they do?
One thing I have noticed is that whenever a transgender person makes something of themselves and enters the public eye, they end up getting slapped with the trans label. Instead of being the female golfer, or the female mountain biker, or the female appointed to the Commerce Department by President Obama, they end up being labeled as the transgender golfer, the transgender mountain biker, or the transgender woman appointed to the Commerce Department. And, of course, I'm using the more polite adjectives.
It's almost as though we're not expected to do anything with our lives, and then when we do, they label us as though to say that we either don't belong there or to remind people that we should be thrown back to the gutter.
This made me wonder if one could be famous without the whole T thing coming out? And if so, how famous could one be without it being an issue? Sure, there is the super stealth scenario, but someone somewhere likely still knows.
And is that fear of being outed a hindrance for transgender people? Are we afraid to be too good simply because all of the attention might out us? Do we fear going in front of TV cameras or appearing in newspapers for fear that someone might see us and go, "Hey, there's that girl who used to be a boy."
Or are we afraid of our own "community"?
A former teammate of mine transitioned, and when we met in a bar a number of months after his transition, he approached me and asked if I was MTF. He'd found out via some sort of grapevine...a grapevine probably throughout the T community.
Are we our own worst enemies? Will we out one another to our friends, family, or coworkers just to say, "Hey, I know her...she's a transsexual, too" just to provide justification to the success transgender people can obtain. Or are we just too fragile to believe that it's OK for other transgender people to know there are others out there who can make a name for themselves and be highly successful at what they do?
Tuesday, March 02, 2010
Posted from my iPhone
Things have been busy lately. The commute was eating up at least 2 hours of my day so I finally moved this past weekend. Sports, working out, driving all over, cooking, and everything else has kept me from writing much...but it hasn't kept me from experiencing life. I have a number of topics lined up, I just need to find some "me time" to sit down and write.
I did catch the Dr. Oz show a week or two back. To be cliche, it was short and sweet. They never put the segment up on their site (which I was waiting for in order to link the episode), but the TYFA site has the YouTube link. I'm afraid the age at which a person can make a decision about their own transgender medical options will be a growing topic over the next few years, especially as more and more trans youth come out. Hopefully the medical professionals can collect some good data showing positive results for those deciding to pursue transition before 18.
I did catch the Dr. Oz show a week or two back. To be cliche, it was short and sweet. They never put the segment up on their site (which I was waiting for in order to link the episode), but the TYFA site has the YouTube link. I'm afraid the age at which a person can make a decision about their own transgender medical options will be a growing topic over the next few years, especially as more and more trans youth come out. Hopefully the medical professionals can collect some good data showing positive results for those deciding to pursue transition before 18.
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