Thursday, June 25, 2009

Prodigal Sons

It's Pride week in San Francisco, and with it comes the Frameline film festival. I went to And Then Came Lola this past Friday with some lesbian friends, and Prodigal Sons last night with Carissa.

Lola was a cute little movie based on a European film I have never seen, entitled "Run Lola, Run". While it kept me mildly entertained, it also lacked a bit of cohesiveness. It did have a lot of good music intertwined throughout the pedestrian chaos.

Last night, though, was Prodigal Sons, a documentary by a transwoman and her family. This movie was listed as a centerpiece of the film festival, and I can see why. The movie was well edited, had good music, nice transitions (not transsexual transitions), and kept me on the edge of my seat a number of times as I wondered what was going to happen next.

In the same sense as Red Without Blue, this movie was less about someone transitioning, but more about how their transition affected their lives. That's kinda how it should be...where the transsexual part of it just adds depth to a character and is not the end-all be-all of the story.

It's too bad that the Lola movie was packed (there were so many lesbians that I actually used the guy's bathroom since the women's line was way too long) while Prodigal Sons still had a number of available seats. Actually, I hardly noticed many trans people in the audience at all at Prodigal Sons. Of course, I'm not attending the variety of trans-shows tonight, so hopefully there is more of a presence there.

Monday, June 08, 2009

I Lost My Glove

Around a week ago, I went to play in my women's softball league. When I dug into my equipment bag, I couldn't find my glove. It was gone. I rummaged through the trunk of my car to see if it fell out, but it wasn't there. Luckily, a friend of mine had an extra glove and I was able to play using hers.

I emailed my softball team that plays the following night to see if any of them had seen my glove, and they suggested that the scorekeeper might have it. I asked my friend with the extra glove if she was going to be at the game, just in case it wasn't there.

I was lucky. I found my glove sitting in the little lost and found box they had with the scorekeeper.

Although losing a glove isn't that bad, it's a pain losing it, finding a new one, and then breaking it in. I was horribly happy to have my glove back.

While the previous story is actually true, it also serves allegorically to the next section. A lot of times, when bad things happen to me, they seem to happen in bunches.

The company I work for recently merged with another company. They called it a merger, but really, we were purchased by the other company. They had layoffs last year and then notified another division that all of their jobs would be gone by this summer. I knew a number of them and thought they were really good people. I've chatted with a few while they work their last few months in the hopes they can find a new job.

As I was leaving a meeting not long ago, I asked one of my coworkers if he knew of any upcoming projects, because our group's slate of activities was starting to grow thin. And as I walked into a morning meeting with my boss and found a new person in the room, my heart suddenly started beating faster.

So, this is how the "blindside" feels in the game of Survivor.

I don't think words can fully express the feelings you get when you are being laid off. It becomes almost like a movie as you just sit back and watch the characters move without being able to influence the outcome of the situation. "Luckily", I now join the walking dead on our campus, so I have time to look for a new job, and when I finish the job, they'll be providing a nice compensation package.

A few months ago, they had all of our group fill out skill assessment forms so that we could outline all the different areas we were good at. It appears that there is talent overlap with our new company, and as they further delve into the mixture of experience, they make their cuts. One of the unfortunate aspects to our merger is that my former boss now works for the company that purchased us. He also never got to know me as Kara, although he does know I transitioned.

Although losing a job isn't the end of the world, it's a pain losing it, finding a new one, and then breaking in and learning the new ropes.

It's also been very interesting being a part of the walking dead. I'm still doing my job, perhaps even better than before. There has been one woman that got notice and has been able to find a new spot at the company, so it's not totally ruled out one couldn't stay on. A number of coworkers have been shocked by my departure, as I was, in most aspects. I've had good performance reviews, five figure bonuses lately, and have always gotten along well with my coworkers. I even have a lot of my fellow engineers come to me for help on a lot of different items.

This situation does open up a new opportunity, though. My mom is not in the best of health, and with some time off, I may go home and spend some quality time with her and my dad. I figure I can still look for a job on the internet at their house. I almost hope I don't find a job right off the bat so that I can spend the time with my mom, but, then again, if I do find one soon, I'd have a nice chunk of change for a down payment on a place.

I've also started networking with some coworkers and vendors, and hope I can find a spot in the San Francisco Bay area. Growing up a military brat, I'm kinda tired of moving at this point in my life. I also love my friends, the weather, and my teammates. We've got some great stuff planned for the future, but I'd hate to play without a nice glove.