A friend and I had dinner last night, during which we briefly discussed the aspects and logistics of our upcoming SRS’s. Her labiaplasty is slightly after my vaginoplasty, and like my trip in July, we’ll both be hanging out together...except, well, I’m having the main surgery. She noticed hers was less than 100 days away...which meant mine was less than 100 days way as well.
No one would probably expect anyone to discuss some of the physical aspects of SRS using sushi, but we did - both of us laughing over the similarities between a penis and salmon-covered sliced sushi. Wasabi became the testes. I asked her mainly about the position/location where the erectile tissue ended. I think for most male bodies, the erectile tissue runs thru the penis (obviously), then along the underside of the perineum before disappearing into the body. She told me there was still some there, probably to act as an anchor of some sort.
So, yeah, SRS is just around the corner - Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, Superbowl, MLK Jr. Day, then Happy Vagina Day. I received the final copy of my second letter last week after having received a draft copy that needed just a slight tweak.
I also visited with my primary therapist last week. One of our two topics was, of course, SRS. I mentioned to her that some of my friends toned down the event simply because going full time was their main event. Other friends (plus stories I have read) indicate that SRS was their main liberating experience. It was that final step - that last memory of a vestige that still made them a man. I told her this was similar to an astronaut dreaming all of his/her life of walking on the moon, or going into space. It was something - that driving ambition - that led them to pursue something few would ever experience. I can’t imagine the emotion and awe that someone like Neil Armstrong went through in the time leading up to his historic journey to the moon. Is it similar to what a lot of TS go thru leading up to SRS? What happened after he walked on the moon? What type of ambitions does one have after walking on the moon?
Anyway, I told her that going full time and having FFS was a huge event for me. I welcomed finally being me. I knew there would be pain and a long recovery time. Although it was a physical change, it was more of a social event. People recognized the change from male to female. SRS, though, is also a huge event. This time, though, it’s more of a physical journey. Few see what I have below the belt, and I, of course, see it any time I’m naked. This one will be for me. It does, however, open up quite a few social doors, as well as closes several more. Anyway, they are both big events for me - yet for very different reasons.
Finally, Dr. Meltzer’s pre-surgical information packet arrived last week. I skimmed over it, but I haven’t read it in detail, yet. I was also finally able to reach the Meltzer crew to schedule labiaplasty for next summer. I’m also down for body contouring around the waist for more of a feminine figure. Now, my big debate is whether to schedule breast augmentation during either surgery. I was really hoping that my natural breasts would reach a size that I felt comfortable with, but unfortunately, they have kinda puttered out slightly shy of an A cup. I haven’t seen any growth in basically six months. If I do choose to have breast augmentation, I’m not likely to get them very big. I’m just thinking a regular B cup, which still gives plenty of room if they decide to grow more down the line. But they also have to be changed out every 10 years...which kinda sucks.
Last week I received an email from Trista, an old high school semi-girlfriend. She’d recently seen my name on one of those high school reunion websites, and emailed me asking about the “Kara” thing. So, I emailed her back, and gave her the scoop.
Like almost everyone I know from my past, she never thought I would do what I’m doing now. She thought I was very shy as a high schooler (which I was) and wasn’t sure I really liked her or not. I also disclosed something I’ve observed from my limited dating history. I was often attracted to women who were relatively smart and athletic. I told her I wasn’t sure if I was physically and psychologically attracted to her, or if I just tried to live vicariously thru her since I thought we’d be very similar if I had been born physically female. It’s probably a combination of the two. She took things quite well, though.
I’ve also noticed that two of the women I have dated had curly brown hair. Coincidence?
No comments:
Post a Comment