Thursday, February 28, 2008


I participated in a trans-panel at Stanford a little over a month ago. The Clayman Institute hosted Jana Marcus' art entitled Transfigurations (project information) and also had a trans-panel following her discussion of the work she created. Stanford recorded the entire piece, and now has it up on their iTunes section.

There is nudity in the 1 hour 16 minute piece, so it may not be work safe, but for those that never caught the show or one of her talks, it is a very interesting program to watch. Some of the photos in the presentation have never been seen at a show, and have only been visible in her personal slide show...but are now visible online in the iTunes download. The first third of the program is Jana talking about the project and exploring some of those rarely viewed pictures. The last two-thirds of the program is the trans-panel of Stephen, Lyle, Beth, and myself.

Some of my notes:

It rained like 70% of the time during January, and that day was no different...thus, it was a very bad hair day. I have lots of frizz due to the humidity and the light sprinkles that caught my hair that day.

Later in the program, I was trying to think of the word "selfish", but instead used "greedy". (Call it stage fright.) During transition, you often have to be selfish and just think of yourself in order to get done what needs to get done. It was really hard for me to do that since up until that point in my life, I was always trying to make others happy.

The movie bugged out on me a little if I tried skipping around, so you may want to watch the whole thing without skipping portions...and then try skipping around once you have seen it.

Otherwise, enjoy the presentation.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Danger Will Robinson!!! Danger!!! Trans-Overload eminent!!!

It's interesting when things kinda clump together. Tonight, for instance, was my version of trans-night. This afternoon I was in Berkeley talking to the women's sexuality class at Cal. This is like the 5th semester I have spoken to the class on their trans panel.

A friend from Chicago was in town for a minor revision with Dr. O. She called the other night, so I was planning to stop by to see her after Berkeley. When I was parking my car, Becca called looking for a little morale booster before she went to a support group meeting. We chatted for a while, then she was off to the meeting, while I popped in to saw hi to my Chicago friend.

Monday, February 25, 2008


I've never been to a comic book conference before, and since Scully and Mulder were supposed to be there, I figured this would be a good one to attend. Wondercon was this past weekend in San Francisco's Moscone Center. I talked a good friend into going, and we spent the whole day checking out different parts of the show.

OK, I'll admit, I was a little starstruck initially. We saw Lou Feriggno (The Hulk), Richard Hatch and Herb Jefferson (Battlestar Galactica), Chase Masterson (DS9), Peter Mayhew (Star Wars), and a number of other people who appeared in scifi shows over the past few decades.

There was also a booth where you could get a picture taken with this woman who had ginormous arms. Without flexing, she looked like she was flexing. And when she was I mean, she was hot, had a pretty face and definitely a very feminine body...but here were these muscular arms. Sure, the rest of her body was very toned as well, but, yeah, super ginormous arms. My friend could obviously tell I was in to her...and, yes, I had my picture taken with her.

I thought I might run into a geek friend or two, but the only person I recognized at the show was Aejaie Sellers. I said hi to her and her boyfriend in passing, and introduced my friend. I was actually kinda surprised to run into her there, but supposedly this was not her first show. I guess we'll have something to chat about the next time I run into her.

My friend and I wandered around the show for a few hours. During all of that time, I did a ton of people watching. Amongst the geek population lives a large number of the marginally androgynous. I don't have the exact reasons, but there just tends to be a vast array of men with ponytails, etc. Perhaps they just lack some of the routine male rigidness or something, which was quite refreshing to me. I thought I would run into a few transgender people at the show, but really, no one stood out to me. Sure, there were a few guys that may have shown some signs, but if they were, they still appeared to be in the male mode. And there were surprisingly a lot of women/girls there...more so than I would have expected. Perhaps some of the female artists as well as the panel content drew them in. I know it drew me in when it was announced both David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson would be appearing.

I dragged my friend off to the X-Files panel that afternoon (go to and plug in x-files and wondercon for a ton of clips). They showed a trailer for the new movie this summer, which they are still filming. In fact, the "whole crew" flew down for the convention after having like zero sleep the night before. I guess that is one of the downsides to filming a lot of night time scenes such as the X-Files would have. Gillian Anderson had this elegant glow to her that I could still manage to see from the 42nd row in which I was sitting. And her hair...omg...I would die for her hair.

Overall, I had a really good time, and enjoyed spending the day with all of the geeks.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Pictures of you, pictures of me

I've been cleaning out portions of my room in stages. Today, I tackled one of my closets. I organized a number of athletic gear, threw out a ton of stuff, and then sorted through a few boxes. One of these boxes contained letters from my past:
  • A summer letter exchange with a New York girl I met online in the infancy of the internet IM system of the early 90's.
  • An exchange with a high school friend fighting in the Gulf War of the late 80's / early 90's.
  • High school friends that moved away.
  • A letter from a woman I had a fling with before I moved to California.
  • High school graduation items.
Most of these letters were sent before email really caught on.

They were, of course, all addressed to my previous name. I am part pack rat, but I've been getting better. Perhaps part of me was afraid to throw away those last remaining things I hold from my boy years...things that indicate the male curtain in front of the one woman show.

I tossed them all away. Well, except for the one letter from the fling...I held on to it, and placed it safely away in an old box of photos.

Monday, February 04, 2008

This little piggy went bluuuuhhhhh!

So, I'm out partying with a teammate Saturday night. She's just turned 30 and has invited over 30 women to join her at AsiaSF for dinner, dancing, and the possibility to move on to a strip club afterward. Yes, most of them are lesbians.

When I first saw the dinner invite for AsiaSF, I was a little surprised, but figured it would be cool to see how my friends are with transsexuals dancing around on the bar once an hour. I sat with a variety people, some friends that I've known for a few years, and others I'd just met that night.

It's funny listening to genetic women disgusted over how incredible some of the dancers bodies are. They're just as envious as I am, but in actuality, some of the genetic women had just as awesome of bodies as the ones dancing on the bar top. I guess a lot of women just feel ashamed about their bodies, even though they look fine.

One of the things I did notice, though, is that even though most of the dancers would never be recognized as a transsexual when walking down the street, and by any other means would only appear to be a genetic woman, a number of the lesbians continued to call all of them "he" or "him". Only a few called them "she". A few of them switched back and forth from male to female pronouns, which I found kinda interesting. I wonder what type of switch was activating inside that brain of theirs. Was it the pronouns used by others that caused them to switch according to who was talking and listening. Was it simple peer pressure, or was their brain trying to wrap itself around how to describe these beauties that strut their stuff for all to see?

Dinner was fairly late, and we caught the last dance of the evening with all of the dancers closing out the evening. I could swear a number of the lesbians were trying to hook up with a T or two, which seemed pretty progressive in a way. A few of my friends called it a night, but I decided to follow a few (along with the birthday girl) to a strip club. We stood outside around 1:45am waiting for our birthday girl to arrive, but as 2am drew close, we decided to check up on her. Our coach was out with us as well, and we all went to search for them. After finding her and three others having issues, we decided to drop them off at their hotel and call it a night.

Unfortunately for me, I end up transporting one of the women who is having issues, and begins having a panic attack in my back seat. Halfway to her hotel, she pukes in my back seat, with half of it eventually making it out the door. Gross. My car is brand new. It's a two-seater, so there are no windows in back. Because she was sitting right behind me, I basically had to slide my seat up all the way and lean forward onto the steering wheel so she could get her head outside the car while we're stopped at a green light in downtown San Francisco.

Sigh. I spent 3-4:30am trying to clean the vomit and vomit smell out of my car using a garden hose and spray cleaner. I checked out my car yesterday afternoon, and there was still a bit of funk to I was back out there with laundry detergent and the garden hose. I think the smell is now gone. I left the sunroof and windows slightly open all day to try to air it out, and it didn't seem to smell on my way to and from work.

No more drunk lesbians in my car from now on!!! And some wonder why I dislike hauling people around. Going forward, I have to start playing the "I'm too old to stay out this late"-card so I can skip out before everyone gets plastered.