Happy Mom's Day

I flew into Oz on Friday to visit with my mom and dad over Mom's Day weekend. Mom has her last chemo session this coming Thursday, so it was nice to catch up with her as she nears the end of her treatments.

I flew in Friday afternoon, and after opening my previously checked bag, I found that the TSA had inspected it. Now, since I was going to be gone all weekend and not returning until Monday, I had packed my dilators, along with a tube of Surgilube. Inside my bag was also packed my laptop's mouse. For whatever reasons, my bag was inspected. I can only imagine a TSA inspector pulling out the cloth wrapped dilators, sliding one out of its slot, and then realizing what he was holding. Whenever I find that they have inspected my bag, the dilator case is typically not wrapped the same way, and has usually been repackaged in plenty of what I assume is haste. I think I'll wash them before I use them again.

This past Wednesday, though, I was on a panel assembled by the Billy DeFrank Center to talk to the area suicide prevention foundation. Being on this panel was actually dear to me because I've had numerous friends seriously attempt or think about suicide often enough that it is a problem. There are also a lot of transgender (and gay and lesbian) people that contemplate suicide on an ongoing basis.

I don't have the exact numbers, but it has been estimated that between 30-40% of all suicides are by lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender people, when they only comprise about 5-10% of the population. Why is a small group such a large portion of those that commit suicide? I think the answer is obvious. LGBT people are actually or perceptually oppressed, discriminated against, and hated by straight people or closeted gay people. As many LGBT people will tell you, no one would seriously choose to be this way (although some would disagree with me on that).

There is so much pressure from society to conform to the heteronormative that many people would rather kill themselves than let anyone know or deal with the oppression that comes with being LGBT in certain regions of the US and world.

Even while I was in Oz and shopping with my parents at Big Box Mart, we heard a bunch of sirens go by. The guy who was assisting my parents with some garden items was part of the local fire department and was wearing a scanner. He told us that all of the sirens were headed to someone who shot himself. After the medical team arrived, they determined that it was a suicide, and the man had died after shooting himself in the heart.

Was he gay or transgender? Had he lost the love of his life? Did he lose his job? Why did he kill himself??? We may never know.

If anyone you know is contemplating suicide, or anyone needs someone to talk to, there are plenty of suicide prevention hotlines around. Please call one of them...they aren't there to judge you, but are simply there to listen and help you if you need it.