Tonight, I dug out the old video camera and was looking at previous tapes for reality show applications. They are basically a small record of my transition as the first ones are me when I was still trying to live as a guy. Further along, one can see the different changes at the beginning of my transition.
One of the videos is while I was still wearing that stupid red wig. I probably hadn’t even started hormones. My voice was absolutely horrid. My walk was rigid. Watching it made me shudder. Even watching the old ‘male’ videos was hard to a degree. It almost felt like seeing a ghost or remnant of a person that...that...no longer exists?
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