Quintessence

Believe it or not, I was back in dance class this week. Yes, the same one I attended last year…but as a guy then. The instructor is fine with it, as well as a few students that were in last year’s class. How do I know? Well, I stopped by to see them a few months ago…just to see how things were. The instructor looked at me a few seconds, asked if I was waiting on someone, then smiled and said she recognized me. She was so cool.

Anyway, you’d think that with the pain I feel when someone uses “he” or “him”, that I wouldn’t step foot in a place where they knew me as a guy. Well, I like the class. I learned a little finesse and grace last year, as well as how to let the female vibe mature. It takes time to loosen up the muscles and areas that you need to move in order to express the feminine essence.

So, one of the good and bad points to the class though, is that there are a lot of really attractive young women in the class. They drive me wild with their incredibly feminine bodies, yet they are a great teaching tool for me. The most advantageous one for me, though, is definitely the grace part of it. Sure, you can stick books on your head and walk down the hall like a girl, but that doesn’t actually teach you about real life situations (such as a dance floor :) ). Learning the moves is another part, but it takes that release from the male inhibitions that makes the difference.

Seeing some of the incredible bodies, though, made me realize something from earlier this week. In a magazine, I saw the picture of this ultra-feminine woman. She had a tiny little waist, a great body, small thin arms, a pretty face, and awesome hair. She just oozed “female.” I want that, as do a lot of women…well, let me rephrase….perhaps some women do. The thing is, I also like to participate in sports and exercise. By doing that, though, my muscles seem to stay intact at their current size. It’s a no win situation. The best I can hope for, which my therapist actually recommended, was to continue to exercise because it was healthy, and let the hormones do their thing over time. Basically, keep things in moderation like the rest of life, and things will turn out OK.