I have to admit...I'm a little nervous. My athletic team is headed on the road this weekend, and after our competition, we'll be changing in the locker room. I've been in plenty of locker rooms before, but this will be the first time in a women's locker room with women around. I haven't told my teammates that I am transgender (and if they already know, they have not indicated it to me). I'm worried that after my clothes are off, they will realize that I'm a transsexual and freak out or something.
I've debated coming out to them, but I fear once they know that their attitude to me will change. I'm always treated slightly different once people know. Typically it's a subtle difference, but once in a while it's a little more noticeable.
In my case, though, most of the women on our team are lesbian women, but don't run around telling people that they are lesbians...so why should it be any different for me, right?
I dunno. I don't think now is the best time to tell them, so if things happen...things happen. I think they'll be cool about it, but I figure I'm just going to put it out of my head and concentrate more on the game.
5 comments:
You know that I wouldn't say anything (but that just may be me). I don't see how it could come out just by changing clothes in the locker room, women come in all shapes and sizes.
If confronted with it, don't deny it. Just go with the "I thought you already knew" strategy.
Just an idea but that is what I would do.
i don't understand the worry-i mean i had surgery a few yrs back-not tg related-why continue being focused on being tg? I don't continue to call myself,"bad knee guy".It's done,over.
"Let it go"
Those who live in the past usually don't escape it's clutches....
(not being a butthead-not w/ bloogger
I'm a LJ type)
TP
It's not a focus on being T, it's just a concern over whether to come out to my teammates so, if they find out I'm T, they won't feel like I was being dishonest with them.
I don't think non-TG surgery can compare to the pressure T's face in living their lives as who they are, yet other people seeing them differently once they know their past. I've seen plenty of people change once they know my past, and it's not fun. I start getting male pronouns even after they tell me they had no idea I used to live as a man. It's like, hey, you didn't think I was a man before, why are you using male pronouns now?
Anyway, the locker room turned out to be a non-issue since there weren't any showers. We drove back all gooey....well, except we were wearing clean clothes.
As for a comparison as to how people change, I'll use the child molester example. A guy (or woman) could be active with youth in a very positive way, but once they find out he or she might have molested children in the past, the parent's attitudes change and they won't let their children near them. It's a severe analogy, but it's one of those things were people go, "you should have told me" because they feel the right that they should know. Being a transsexual woman, though, has nothing to do with being a child molester. I have to admit, I'm not that big on kids in general.
Kara
I see but what choice do you really have? You have to wear the "scarlett letter" (to say)in society,so isn't it better to just be (really quite beyond the call of duty)open? If bigoted people choose to hate you,so be it but it's better to know who your real friends are anyway.
Of course this begs the question: Must all TG individuals make themselves a public(or quasi-public) figure,to simplify their lives? A rather harsh choice,I'm sure.
TP
Just be what you are and people will accept you na.Not think too much how other people might tink of you. You are a girl!
Alex
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