15...there’s still time for you

This past Tuesday I was in a meeting with Robi and Pete. Actually, we were between meetings and just kinda chatting. We somehow end up on tangents quite frequently in some of our smaller meetings. This time, we were talking about a cake party later on that day for a woman who just got married. Then we started talking about weddings. Robi mentioned what she would do..or perhaps what she wouldn’t do...for her wedding. She also then states she has me pegged for a foofy white dress wedding. I tell her it wouldn’t be foofy, but more like a simple white dress with no lace. I wouldn’t get married in a church either, basically because I’m not religious and not many churches will preside over a transsexual wedding. I’d rather do it outside anyway. Anyway, I think planning for a wedding at this stage is quite premature, but just like a 15 year old girl, I can still dream.

Later that day, I had my hair treated with a Japanese hair straightening method. It didn’t turn out quite as well as my stylist would have liked, but it looked a lot straighter than it used to be. He only charged me half price and told me to call him again in three weeks to see if he could touch it up.

On my way home, I heard the Five for Fighting song, 100 Years. I cried. It’s a very sad song that reflects on different stages of life, but always comes back to “15...there’s still time for you”. Being T, it also hits hard as it talks about all of the things a lot of us will never have. The main theme of the song is that if you are 15, you still have the rest of your life ahead of you. He also sings of other ages at which we have things in our life occur...22, 33, 50, 67, and 99, and how they are just moments that all occur in our life. “33...you’re on your way” is one of the lines near the end, and since I’m 33 and on my own unique way, it does hit kinda hard. Death has always been a hard thing for me, and I know there’s no putting off getting old, but you just have to enjoy the life you have. My life is pretty screwed up being T, but I have to make the best of it and live my life to the fullest.