The breakup

Love. It’s such a wicked little creature.

I arrived home today from my mid-day scheduled activity. E had been up for a little over an hour. As I was headed to the shower, E told me that E would not be around again tonite since E was having a business dinner to discuss future consulting work. Last night, E was off with a bunch of colleagues until 2am.

Before I fully closed the bathroom door, I indicated my displeasure with not having E around for another weekend night. I thought about it further in the shower, and discussed our relationship upon drying off.

It’s difficult for me to be the deprived girlfriend. I hardly get to see E as it is, and when E is around, E’s off with friends, colleagues, or future business meetings. I guess I’m just being greedy, but I’d like to have E for myself some nights or be taken along.

I mean, E is one of those person’s that could easily become a millionaire, and I have no doubt that E has forever left E’s mark on the world...it’s just determining how big a mark it will be. I guess when it comes down to it, I’d rather have a lover that shares a little time with me than one I'll never see who is going to be super rich or famous. I don’t want to be the hidden secret in the closet. I want to be a significant influence in a relationship that thrives.

The hard part is that E and I get along really well outside of my deprived girlfriend feelings. Neither of us smoke or do drugs, nor do we drink. We’re both technical people and fairly similar in age. We do have our share of uncommon characteristics as well, though....but to me, those items just gave our relationship an opportunity to grow.

I sat in bed resting from an active morning, but also cried when E and I reached a mutual decision that staying together might not be the right thing right now.

Love sucks.