I visited Dr. Gray’s office this morning to talk further about body contouring. After visiting with the other two plastic surgeons, I thought he was going to tell me the same thing…but he didn’t. In fact, he said he’d performed body contouring on several transgender patients, especially around the waist. It’s wild that many professional people in the San Francisco area handle the whole T thing quite well. I guess they have just been exposed to it enough to know that we’re just like everyone else out there.
In describing his method, he said he uses ultrasonics to break down the fat and small cannulas to remove it thru three small incisions – one in the belly button, the other 100mm below the belly button, and the third one a little lower than the small of the back.
We talked about the usual possible side effects with liposuction, such as bruising, swelling, unevenness, rippling, etc. He said I didn’t have as much on the stomach as he usually sees, but he still had something to work with. The dressings would stay on for a couple of days, and the compression pad would stay on for a couple of weeks.
So, the bill:
Doctor Fees $4000
Garments $ 250
Operating Room Fees $1260
Anesthesia Free
Total $5510
Youch! Even with last week’s very nice raise and bonus, this is still not really affordable with SRS on the horizon. So, I continue on with my diet. I’m on Day 3, and it royally sucks. It’s been nothing but small bowls of bran cereal, salads, veggies, a banana, and one veggie burger so far. Yum….right?
As I was leaving Dr. Gray’s office, though, there was this incredibly beautiful woman sitting in the waiting room. In fact, there was a beautiful woman in the waiting room while I was waiting who obviously was already in the other exam room. The one sitting in the waiting room as I left was gorgeous…and of course, I was extremely jealous. I think I am just going to move to the island of ugly women and be a camp counselor…..”this one time, at ugly-woman camp......”
Tuesday, August 31, 2004
Sunday, August 29, 2004
Puissance
Amber, Amy, and I went to the Vagina Monologues in Napa yesterday. It was a nice little theatre (the Napa Valley Opera House) that, from the program book, had been restored from once horrible conditions. I was really impressed with the nice facility. Unfortunately, I think I was less impressed with the Vagina Monologues, even though it does talk about how powerful a woman and her vagina can be. In February of this year, there was a special transgender version of the Vagina Monologues presented in LA by Andrea James and Calpernica Addams. Several of my friends attended said event, but I, however, was laid up in the Cocoon House recovering from FFS. So, this was my chance to catch a glimpse of what I missed…although I knew it wouldn’t come close to the presentation in LA. We missed about the first 10-15 minutes, and since I don’t have a vagina yet, I couldn’t quite relate on many of the topics. I was almost as clueless as the large older gentleman sitting in the seat next to me and hogging a portion of both my elbow and leg space. Luckily, Amber, who's smaller than me, was sitting to my left, which allowed me to lean a little to her side in order to escape the impending man and to see past the hairdo on the woman sitting in front of me. Don’t worry, I’m usually cursed with that…I’m used to it…especially since I’m short.
So, why were we late? Well, on the way there we had a hell of a time. First, we ran into a back up on the first bridge. In trying to go around it, we kinda got on to side streets that didn’t quite go where we were hoping to go, followed by street repairs and closures on streets we did want to take. We ran into more traffic before we picked up Amy and ate a fast lunch. On the bridge before the Napa exit, we ran into a 4 mile back up before the toll booths. It’s incredible…the traffic is worse on the weekends than it is on the weekdays. Even when we finally reached the street to turn on in Napa, we found the bridge was out forcing us to go another block north.
Anyway, that gave us a little extra time in the car. When it was just Amber and I, she asked me what my expectations are with SRS. Well, for me, I thought it was the last little link on the chain holding me back from the rest of my life, but I wanted to ponder a little more of this question. What ARE my expectations?
I expect…
…to have a vaginal cavity capable of having sex.
…to have pants and undies fit a lot better.
…to go swimming in a bathing suit.
…to ride my bike without Jr. in the way.
…to dilate for the rest of my life.
…to not worry about tucking anymore.
…to douche.
…to have complications of some sort.
…to still have people freaked out about who I used to be.
…to have people still use male pronouns.
…to stop taking spironolactone.
…to sit down to pee for the rest of my life.
…to laugh.
…to cry.
…to ponder.
…to move on with my life.
…to not be afraid of someone finding out I have a penis.
…to be over the vast majority of GID.
…to love.
…to have sex.
…to run and race again.
…to be basically the same person.
…to be me.
…to live.
So, why were we late? Well, on the way there we had a hell of a time. First, we ran into a back up on the first bridge. In trying to go around it, we kinda got on to side streets that didn’t quite go where we were hoping to go, followed by street repairs and closures on streets we did want to take. We ran into more traffic before we picked up Amy and ate a fast lunch. On the bridge before the Napa exit, we ran into a 4 mile back up before the toll booths. It’s incredible…the traffic is worse on the weekends than it is on the weekdays. Even when we finally reached the street to turn on in Napa, we found the bridge was out forcing us to go another block north.
Anyway, that gave us a little extra time in the car. When it was just Amber and I, she asked me what my expectations are with SRS. Well, for me, I thought it was the last little link on the chain holding me back from the rest of my life, but I wanted to ponder a little more of this question. What ARE my expectations?
I expect…
…to have a vaginal cavity capable of having sex.
…to have pants and undies fit a lot better.
…to go swimming in a bathing suit.
…to ride my bike without Jr. in the way.
…to dilate for the rest of my life.
…to not worry about tucking anymore.
…to douche.
…to have complications of some sort.
…to still have people freaked out about who I used to be.
…to have people still use male pronouns.
…to stop taking spironolactone.
…to sit down to pee for the rest of my life.
…to laugh.
…to cry.
…to ponder.
…to move on with my life.
…to not be afraid of someone finding out I have a penis.
…to be over the vast majority of GID.
…to love.
…to have sex.
…to run and race again.
…to be basically the same person.
…to be me.
…to live.
Thursday, August 26, 2004
Adolescence and Evanescence
I took a phone call on the hotline today from the mother of an FTM. She was looking for a particular therapist in the area. After talking to her for a while, she said that her transgender son was 13. Wow. Thirteen. That’s just incredible that there continue to be reports of transgender people that seem to be getting younger and younger. I’m sure they have always been there, but now parents are hopefully able to understand a little more of what is going on, and not boot them out into the street.
What if we were able to start treatment before puberty hit us? Would that eliminate so much of the GID? Would our bodies be allowed to develop along the lines of our minds before having to experience the horrible aspects of the wrong puberty? I’m sure that would be ideal for a lot of us, but the hard part is getting past what society thinks of us. High school is already hard enough without even going through transition. And the pinnacle action belongs to the parents on whether or not to support their child. Without their support, transition becomes almost impossible at that age.
Back now to the mid-thirties, I was at Dr. Brownstein’s office today to talk about body contouring. He basically said the same as the first plastic surgeon – that I didn’t have much to work with. He said that he could get me about 20% of what I was probably looking for, and asked me if that would be enough. I don’t think it would be, especially for the cost, pain, recovery time, and possible complications.
So, with that, along with having too much muscle, I’ve decided to do the veggie diet for a while and see what effects that will have on what I am looking for. I’m basically finishing off what food I do have in the house, but then I’ll be cutting it down to veggies and salads, with perhaps some fruit for breakfast. Diet’s suck. To really lose weight, one has to change their habits. I’ve changed over the years – quitting caffeine and most sodas, drinking more water, removing chips from my diet, and eating more vegetables. I’ve still been eating way too much sugar, though, which mainly goes to feeding the muscles and my chocolate craving.
With this second puberty, though, I’ve noticed a lot of fat move to the ass and thighs. I’ve also noticed that I run a lot slower than what I used to run. Here’s the thing, though. When I ran in high school, I noticed that the freshman girls were usually the faster runners. Once the girls started developing, most of them slowed down…not all, but most. We also had a girl in college who came in a little chubby as a freshman but really leaned out over the next couple of years. She became an excellent runner. So, I’m going through what a lot of girls go through in high school….development. I believe that once I move past SRS and a few more years of solid hormones, I can drop down to a lower dosage…at which time, I hope I will be able to thin out a bit…although I’m not really that fat-chubby now.
What if we were able to start treatment before puberty hit us? Would that eliminate so much of the GID? Would our bodies be allowed to develop along the lines of our minds before having to experience the horrible aspects of the wrong puberty? I’m sure that would be ideal for a lot of us, but the hard part is getting past what society thinks of us. High school is already hard enough without even going through transition. And the pinnacle action belongs to the parents on whether or not to support their child. Without their support, transition becomes almost impossible at that age.
Back now to the mid-thirties, I was at Dr. Brownstein’s office today to talk about body contouring. He basically said the same as the first plastic surgeon – that I didn’t have much to work with. He said that he could get me about 20% of what I was probably looking for, and asked me if that would be enough. I don’t think it would be, especially for the cost, pain, recovery time, and possible complications.
So, with that, along with having too much muscle, I’ve decided to do the veggie diet for a while and see what effects that will have on what I am looking for. I’m basically finishing off what food I do have in the house, but then I’ll be cutting it down to veggies and salads, with perhaps some fruit for breakfast. Diet’s suck. To really lose weight, one has to change their habits. I’ve changed over the years – quitting caffeine and most sodas, drinking more water, removing chips from my diet, and eating more vegetables. I’ve still been eating way too much sugar, though, which mainly goes to feeding the muscles and my chocolate craving.
With this second puberty, though, I’ve noticed a lot of fat move to the ass and thighs. I’ve also noticed that I run a lot slower than what I used to run. Here’s the thing, though. When I ran in high school, I noticed that the freshman girls were usually the faster runners. Once the girls started developing, most of them slowed down…not all, but most. We also had a girl in college who came in a little chubby as a freshman but really leaned out over the next couple of years. She became an excellent runner. So, I’m going through what a lot of girls go through in high school….development. I believe that once I move past SRS and a few more years of solid hormones, I can drop down to a lower dosage…at which time, I hope I will be able to thin out a bit…although I’m not really that fat-chubby now.
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
Adolescence of life
I’ve met a lot of different people along my transition. I’ve met cross dressers who look better than most TS starting out, yet they like being men. I’ve met T’s who don’t take hormones but have orchiectomies and breast implants, T’s who take hormones yet prefer to live with a penis, T’s who battle their own sexual orientation while self administering hormones off and on over years, T’s who get thru transition but seem a little out of it once through to the other side, T’s who have transitioned over a few years and done fairly well with life, young T’s who look incredible with their bodies only partially tainted by the evil testosterone, older T’s who fight the public’s stereotype of being a man in a dress, older T’s that transitioned and had SRS 20 years ago...paving the way for many of us, and everything in between. Hell, I’ve even met a transsexual porn star who looks totally incredible, but she keeps her penis for her job…and because it makes her special.
I’ve lived 32 years as a shell of a man, over a year part time as a person figuring out their essence, and as a woman for 6 months. I’ve lived in a town with only 2000 people all the way up to the metro Bay Area.
The thing is, though, I am just a child in terms of experience. We all are. There are so many things for us to learn in life, that if we give up the pursuit of knowledge...well...we’re just giving up. I’m not an expert. The only things I can share are the things that I have experienced first hand. Although I may see one formula to success, there are, indeed, other formulas that can get you to relatively the same place. Anyway, I guess I am just writing this to say that if you are still searching for your road to success, figure out where you are, where you want to be, and how you can get there….and plan what you will do if you run into lions and tigers and bears.
I’ve lived 32 years as a shell of a man, over a year part time as a person figuring out their essence, and as a woman for 6 months. I’ve lived in a town with only 2000 people all the way up to the metro Bay Area.
The thing is, though, I am just a child in terms of experience. We all are. There are so many things for us to learn in life, that if we give up the pursuit of knowledge...well...we’re just giving up. I’m not an expert. The only things I can share are the things that I have experienced first hand. Although I may see one formula to success, there are, indeed, other formulas that can get you to relatively the same place. Anyway, I guess I am just writing this to say that if you are still searching for your road to success, figure out where you are, where you want to be, and how you can get there….and plan what you will do if you run into lions and tigers and bears.
Monday, August 23, 2004
Senescence
The door handle on my car broke again this past week. A friend was able to repair it when it broke the first time a coupe of months ago, but I don’t think I can continually try to fix it. I need a new handle. My car is now 9 years old, and although it is that old, it’s still in fairly decent shape. However, it is also trying to fall apart. Right now, it’s all about the little things…the door handle, the visor anchor clip, the sun roof, the windshield wiper fluid tank sensor, and a few paint issues here and there. I don’t gun my engine too bad, so it seems to be running ok, except for a few squeaks here and there…but some of my friends tend to push it when I lend them my car. They don’t seem to realize that my car needs to last another 60,000 miles – in healthy condition.
So, not only has my car been getting older, but so have I. Time takes its toll. I try to fight back. I try to eat healthy – for both the body and the mind – which is my excuse for eating chocolate and ice cream on occasion.
Being T, though, does suck on some fronts…especially the aging one. I never had my youth as a girl, and so, I have definitely tried to hang on to what I have. I had FFS 6 months ago and filler injected into my nasolabial folds three months ago…in order to look female…and younger. The initial filler was only supposed to last a few months, and I could see it starting to decrease as the laugh lines became prominent again. So, I was off to the plastic surgeon again to have one of the wizards fill them in again…but this time with a different substance called Radiance. It’s supposed to last a bit longer…perhaps from 2-5 years. After lidocaine injections thru my mouth, he injected the Radiance in to the folds area between my mid-nose down to the lines even with the top of my mouth. He says they can’t go all the way down along the lines because the muscles used for smiling would interfere with the product working properly. I felt the filler being injected into my skin, but only slight pressure in the areas. As the lidocaine started wearing off, though, I noticed a slight soreness. It was also quite puffy and definitely red, with a slight bruise in one area where he injected.
The swelling has subsided tonight, but it’s still a touch sore. They said that it would feel weird for a few days, and that it would reduce slightly inside the first 2-4 months, but would remain there for a number of years.
So, not only has my car been getting older, but so have I. Time takes its toll. I try to fight back. I try to eat healthy – for both the body and the mind – which is my excuse for eating chocolate and ice cream on occasion.
Being T, though, does suck on some fronts…especially the aging one. I never had my youth as a girl, and so, I have definitely tried to hang on to what I have. I had FFS 6 months ago and filler injected into my nasolabial folds three months ago…in order to look female…and younger. The initial filler was only supposed to last a few months, and I could see it starting to decrease as the laugh lines became prominent again. So, I was off to the plastic surgeon again to have one of the wizards fill them in again…but this time with a different substance called Radiance. It’s supposed to last a bit longer…perhaps from 2-5 years. After lidocaine injections thru my mouth, he injected the Radiance in to the folds area between my mid-nose down to the lines even with the top of my mouth. He says they can’t go all the way down along the lines because the muscles used for smiling would interfere with the product working properly. I felt the filler being injected into my skin, but only slight pressure in the areas. As the lidocaine started wearing off, though, I noticed a slight soreness. It was also quite puffy and definitely red, with a slight bruise in one area where he injected.
The swelling has subsided tonight, but it’s still a touch sore. They said that it would feel weird for a few days, and that it would reduce slightly inside the first 2-4 months, but would remain there for a number of years.
Thursday, August 19, 2004
Quintessence
Believe it or not, I was back in dance class this week. Yes, the same one I attended last year…but as a guy then. The instructor is fine with it, as well as a few students that were in last year’s class. How do I know? Well, I stopped by to see them a few months ago…just to see how things were. The instructor looked at me a few seconds, asked if I was waiting on someone, then smiled and said she recognized me. She was so cool.
Anyway, you’d think that with the pain I feel when someone uses “he” or “him”, that I wouldn’t step foot in a place where they knew me as a guy. Well, I like the class. I learned a little finesse and grace last year, as well as how to let the female vibe mature. It takes time to loosen up the muscles and areas that you need to move in order to express the feminine essence.
So, one of the good and bad points to the class though, is that there are a lot of really attractive young women in the class. They drive me wild with their incredibly feminine bodies, yet they are a great teaching tool for me. The most advantageous one for me, though, is definitely the grace part of it. Sure, you can stick books on your head and walk down the hall like a girl, but that doesn’t actually teach you about real life situations (such as a dance floor :) ). Learning the moves is another part, but it takes that release from the male inhibitions that makes the difference.
Seeing some of the incredible bodies, though, made me realize something from earlier this week. In a magazine, I saw the picture of this ultra-feminine woman. She had a tiny little waist, a great body, small thin arms, a pretty face, and awesome hair. She just oozed “female.” I want that, as do a lot of women…well, let me rephrase….perhaps some women do. The thing is, I also like to participate in sports and exercise. By doing that, though, my muscles seem to stay intact at their current size. It’s a no win situation. The best I can hope for, which my therapist actually recommended, was to continue to exercise because it was healthy, and let the hormones do their thing over time. Basically, keep things in moderation like the rest of life, and things will turn out OK.
Anyway, you’d think that with the pain I feel when someone uses “he” or “him”, that I wouldn’t step foot in a place where they knew me as a guy. Well, I like the class. I learned a little finesse and grace last year, as well as how to let the female vibe mature. It takes time to loosen up the muscles and areas that you need to move in order to express the feminine essence.
So, one of the good and bad points to the class though, is that there are a lot of really attractive young women in the class. They drive me wild with their incredibly feminine bodies, yet they are a great teaching tool for me. The most advantageous one for me, though, is definitely the grace part of it. Sure, you can stick books on your head and walk down the hall like a girl, but that doesn’t actually teach you about real life situations (such as a dance floor :) ). Learning the moves is another part, but it takes that release from the male inhibitions that makes the difference.
Seeing some of the incredible bodies, though, made me realize something from earlier this week. In a magazine, I saw the picture of this ultra-feminine woman. She had a tiny little waist, a great body, small thin arms, a pretty face, and awesome hair. She just oozed “female.” I want that, as do a lot of women…well, let me rephrase….perhaps some women do. The thing is, I also like to participate in sports and exercise. By doing that, though, my muscles seem to stay intact at their current size. It’s a no win situation. The best I can hope for, which my therapist actually recommended, was to continue to exercise because it was healthy, and let the hormones do their thing over time. Basically, keep things in moderation like the rest of life, and things will turn out OK.
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
Twice, reminiscence
Six months ago, I spent a large portion of the day having Dr. O reshape my face. The time really seems to have flown by. Since I am at 6 months, I guess I should provide a little update…starting from the top, and working down.
The top of my head is still a bit tingly. The portion of my scalp nearest the hairline is probably around 95%, while I have a very small circle on the very top of my head that I can’t really feel anything. Between the front and that spot, it ranges in sensation. When I touch the top of my head, it still has that sorta sparkly sensation. It’s still similar to the feeling when the lidocaine is wearing off after a trip to the dentist. The scar along the hairline is basically this thin white line. I’m definitely going to need another hairline revision to bring the sides further forward, though. I asked Dr. O about the nerve loss with the revision at my three month checkup, and he said it was hit or miss. I’ll talk to him a little more next month during my visit. The hairline advancement gets a B+.
The forehead looks pretty decent…in fact, it looks great. There might be a very small ridge/bump/depression just over the right part of my nose, but it’s barely noticeable. Last week, though, I did see a lot of little tiny bumps directly over where Dr. O worked on my sinus cavity, but they’ve subsided this week. Perhaps it was just my skin reacting to something in that area, who knows. My eyebrows are fairly even and in the spot they should be in. So, the forehead gets an A.
The nose. Awww…the nose. Well, it’s still fairly stiff, especially at the lower end and tip area. The small bumps on the sides of the top portion are still there, and about the only thing they really affect is the way glasses sit on my nose. My nose still points slightly to my left. It also seems to drip, especially when I’m exposed to colder temperatures, although sometimes it just spontaneously starts dripping for no reason. The scars at the base of my nose are visible only upon close inspection. The upper lip looks great – it’s very full and feminine, much as it was before, but slightly fuller. The upper lip lift scar, though, is still fairly tight combined with the nose job. As for the shape of the nose itself, it has gotten better with time, but I still do not like the ski-jump profile shape. I wanted straight. I wanted just a regular transition of the nose into the forehead. I still have at least another 6 months to let the swelling go down before I pass my final judgment, but I’ll live with it for now. I’ll give the nose a C+ and hope it improves with time. The upper lip lift gets an A-, simply because it’s still tight (and has the slight scar).
One thing that I noticed between months 3-6 is that my bottom front teeth are actually numb. I really didn’t notice this until I started flossing around month 3-4 (it was just too hard to get the floss in my mouth before that). When I went between the bottom teeth with the floss, I found that I couldn’t really feel anything. I thought they might have been a little tingly, but they are basically still numb….well, the gum line is numb with very slight sensation.
The incision for the chin modifications is still tight as well, and, well….just plain annoying. My chin is also sore in some spots when I press down slightly. The soreness is particularly noticeable after electrolysis. The bumps on the sides of the jaw are still there, but have reduced a little with time. I haven’t really had any troubles with the jaw modification further back along the jaw line. So, the bumps and soreness are going to bring this down to a B.
The trachea shave scar is still visible, and kinda creates this line-dimple when I tilt my head down. There is still some scar tissue beneath the incision and the area down to the trachea. It has become a lot looser in time, but so has the skin under the jaw, it seems. I don’t know if it will recover and pull back up or not. Most likely, it won’t. Grade: B-, but I knew going in that this might happen, so the grade doesn’t really surprise me. It too, though, can get better with time.
This is also right at 2 years of Hormone Replacement Therapy for me. Two years. Wow. The hormones haven’t done as much as I was hoping for, but they have at least tried...and since I am 34 now, I guess they've done OK. The breasts are right at an A cup. My hips and ass are a lot spongier than before and have really filled out. Most portions of my body have definitely softened up. My body hair has gotten a little finer, but it’s still persistently there, unfortunately. My skin is softer, but I don’t think it has reacted quite as well as I was hoping for or have seen with others. Unfortunately, my waist and most of my muscle haven’t really done much in the way of feminizing. My muscles have gotten a little smaller, but they are still fairly big…to me. I do feel a general peace within myself, though, which has made the GID, although still present, much more tolerable.
The top of my head is still a bit tingly. The portion of my scalp nearest the hairline is probably around 95%, while I have a very small circle on the very top of my head that I can’t really feel anything. Between the front and that spot, it ranges in sensation. When I touch the top of my head, it still has that sorta sparkly sensation. It’s still similar to the feeling when the lidocaine is wearing off after a trip to the dentist. The scar along the hairline is basically this thin white line. I’m definitely going to need another hairline revision to bring the sides further forward, though. I asked Dr. O about the nerve loss with the revision at my three month checkup, and he said it was hit or miss. I’ll talk to him a little more next month during my visit. The hairline advancement gets a B+.
The forehead looks pretty decent…in fact, it looks great. There might be a very small ridge/bump/depression just over the right part of my nose, but it’s barely noticeable. Last week, though, I did see a lot of little tiny bumps directly over where Dr. O worked on my sinus cavity, but they’ve subsided this week. Perhaps it was just my skin reacting to something in that area, who knows. My eyebrows are fairly even and in the spot they should be in. So, the forehead gets an A.
The nose. Awww…the nose. Well, it’s still fairly stiff, especially at the lower end and tip area. The small bumps on the sides of the top portion are still there, and about the only thing they really affect is the way glasses sit on my nose. My nose still points slightly to my left. It also seems to drip, especially when I’m exposed to colder temperatures, although sometimes it just spontaneously starts dripping for no reason. The scars at the base of my nose are visible only upon close inspection. The upper lip looks great – it’s very full and feminine, much as it was before, but slightly fuller. The upper lip lift scar, though, is still fairly tight combined with the nose job. As for the shape of the nose itself, it has gotten better with time, but I still do not like the ski-jump profile shape. I wanted straight. I wanted just a regular transition of the nose into the forehead. I still have at least another 6 months to let the swelling go down before I pass my final judgment, but I’ll live with it for now. I’ll give the nose a C+ and hope it improves with time. The upper lip lift gets an A-, simply because it’s still tight (and has the slight scar).
One thing that I noticed between months 3-6 is that my bottom front teeth are actually numb. I really didn’t notice this until I started flossing around month 3-4 (it was just too hard to get the floss in my mouth before that). When I went between the bottom teeth with the floss, I found that I couldn’t really feel anything. I thought they might have been a little tingly, but they are basically still numb….well, the gum line is numb with very slight sensation.
The incision for the chin modifications is still tight as well, and, well….just plain annoying. My chin is also sore in some spots when I press down slightly. The soreness is particularly noticeable after electrolysis. The bumps on the sides of the jaw are still there, but have reduced a little with time. I haven’t really had any troubles with the jaw modification further back along the jaw line. So, the bumps and soreness are going to bring this down to a B.
The trachea shave scar is still visible, and kinda creates this line-dimple when I tilt my head down. There is still some scar tissue beneath the incision and the area down to the trachea. It has become a lot looser in time, but so has the skin under the jaw, it seems. I don’t know if it will recover and pull back up or not. Most likely, it won’t. Grade: B-, but I knew going in that this might happen, so the grade doesn’t really surprise me. It too, though, can get better with time.
This is also right at 2 years of Hormone Replacement Therapy for me. Two years. Wow. The hormones haven’t done as much as I was hoping for, but they have at least tried...and since I am 34 now, I guess they've done OK. The breasts are right at an A cup. My hips and ass are a lot spongier than before and have really filled out. Most portions of my body have definitely softened up. My body hair has gotten a little finer, but it’s still persistently there, unfortunately. My skin is softer, but I don’t think it has reacted quite as well as I was hoping for or have seen with others. Unfortunately, my waist and most of my muscle haven’t really done much in the way of feminizing. My muscles have gotten a little smaller, but they are still fairly big…to me. I do feel a general peace within myself, though, which has made the GID, although still present, much more tolerable.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)