Tuesday, February 10, 2004

Shrug

Still no word out of the company on how they plan on notifying my employees.

After playing sports with ‘da boys’ yesterday, I was pretty sore. I hadn’t been out in quite a while, and my body paid for it. My arm also felt extremely sore, in the same spot I had my lab tests taken. I rolled up my sleeve to find a nicely sized bruise that I hadn’t spotted at all lately. I looked for a bruise the few days after the blood was “drawn” last week, and I never really spotted anything. It’s rather surprising that it took this long for it to pop up. After FFS, I’m going to be pretty bruised, especially around the eyes. I’ve never had a black eye before, but now I’m going to have two of them. Since this bruise on my arm took so long to develop, I wonder how long it’s going to take me to get over the bruising from FFS.

In a conversation with a TS friend this evening, I was asking her about the whole work and disclosure situation. She described to me how she attempts to explain GID to “straights.” I mean, it’s hard enough figuring this out as a TS, how can “straights” really comprehend what we are going through? I asked her, “How do you explain GID to people who have no concept for gender identity? It’s like trying to explain what ‘red’ is to someone who is blind.” I really don’t see how most non-TS people really might be able to understand us. The best we can hope for is simple tolerance and compassion...and understanding that transitioning is the best solution to our condition.

Mark and I were both working late tonite trying to finish up things before this Thursday. He didn’t realize I would be out for surgery next week, the same time he starts a vacation. He was hesitant at first, but was soon asking a few questions like, “What exactly are they going to do?” So, I explained for him what was involved with FFS. He also asks a funny question in his normal Mark tone, “So, is K... your real name? I mean, for our sake, you could have changed it before you moved out here and we never would have known.”

I told him that was my real name, and then shared with him that my new name would be Kara. He didn’t have a problem with that. He then proceeds to tell me that he had no clue about what was going on.

“But what about all of the questions and comments?” I ask.

He just shook his head and kinda shrugged his shoulders.

T-Minus Day 4

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