Flying Home from GP Weekend

Pulled from my written journal

I’m on a plane back to San Francisco now, thus indicating an end to our GP weekend. It was an enjoyable weekend hanging out with everyone, even considering it rained a significant portion of it. I guess I am also very lucky to be in the situation I am in. I’ve been able to personally meet a large number of other T’s around my age via GP, probably doubling the number of Gen Xers I know here in the Bay Area. I’m lucky that we can sit around and talk about a lot of stuff and not have to worry about rejection since we all understand what one another is going through. A lot of the girls that came to Chicago for the GP weekend don’t really have any T friends around their age to hang out with, nor many T friends going through some of the same parts of their journey. I got a lot of big hugs when I said my good-byes last night and this morning. I know quite a few people that had a wonderful time being able to discuss a lot of different issues and see a lot of successful people that have transitioned. Even myself, I was able to talk to Laura about her SRS and how things went for her. She’s an incredibly smart and funny woman, even if I did pick on her a little about a few funny instances.

Like I said, I was able to get to know some of the girls a little better. Quiet Meg finally started opening up to us by Saturday night. She’d never really applied any makeup and was interested in having us show her a few things about applying it. Jaded and Becca figured they would watch as well, whenever Laura and I got around to doing the mini-makeover, that is. Sunday afternoon, we decided to get out when the weather finally decided to cooperate with us. I also told a lot of them that I wanted to get my ears pierced in Chicago since I was past my 3 months of FFS. We walked along the Magnificent Mile and finally found a Claire’s in the Water Tower Place. Becca said she wanted to get her ears pierced as well, so she followed me in the ear piercing ritual. (Note: I do not recommend anyone that is not full time getting their ears pierced simply because they don’t want to give anyone any clues in their transition.) A very kind girl name Romi had me select my earrings and fill out the necessary paperwork. I selected the July birthstone, Ruby, for my studs to be worn continuously for the first 6 weeks. She marked the spots on my ears and had everyone else make sure they were even. She inserted the studs into the device, placed it on my ears, then squeezed as the stud pin ripped through my ear lob and through to the other side. Sure, it hurt a bit, but it was easily tolerable. If electrolysis pain right under the nose is a 10, then this was a 1. Becca followed with silver ball studs.

After finally being pierced, we went downstairs to Marshall Field’s to find some decent makeup for Meg. We helped her pick out some good liquid foundation and powder at Prescriptives. They do a pretty good job of color matching and they were very helpful in matching colors for her even though she was in boy mode. We had a little help at MAC finding her lipstick and a liner pencil, then picked up some of the cheap necessary basics at Walgreens on the way back to the hotel. (By the way, we had excellent service and a wonderful stay at Hotel Allegro in downtown Chicago.) We set her up with some brushes, blush, eye liner pencil, and eye shadows. After eating out with Makenna, Laura, Becca, and Meg at a pretty decent Thai restaurant, we had Meg’s little makeover. She turned out pretty decent, but I think she might have been a little disappointed that she didn’t look more feminine. She has some great features to work with including some great hair. She just needs to take care of some electro mainly on the upper lip. That will help her out the most in the short term. After her makeover, she headed home since she had to work today. The rest of us tried to manage a night out, but it didn’t go quite as planned. Anyway, we still went to bed pretty late (2:30am) with Laura setting her alarm to go off at 4:30am. Youch! That was pretty early this morning. An hour later, I was saying my good-byes to Laura. We had a wonderful time this weekend and got along really well. It was hard to say good-bye. Becca, who crashed in our room, and I got up around 10 to start getting ready. We grabbed a fast breakfast/lunch nearby at a Dunkin Donuts combo place, then said good-bye to the rest of the group. After finishing up my makeup, I checked out then said my good-byes to Becca. I walked half a block north toward the Blue Line back to O’Hare and looked back at Becca who’d walked a half block south to the parking garage that held her car. My weekend was ending – my trip to Chicago was basically over. My own sadness crept over me and I began to tear up. I hate to say good-bye. Suddenly, my phone rang. It was Becca. The garage her car was in was closed and they wouldn’t be open until tomorrow. Crap. She told me to get going to make my flight, but I told her to give Nova and Juri a call to see if they could help. Nova and Juri are two girls living together in a great relationship in Missouri. They met just over a year ago and seem to have found their love in one another. I sorta envy their relationship and hope one day I find a person to share my life with – T or not. I talked with Juri a bit last night and realized both of us grew up near one another. She had her SRS after waiting about 8 years between full time and having the surgery. I don’t know how she was able to manage so long as a pre-op, but the nice thing about waiting was that she met Nova when she was having her SRS. Anyway, Becca called me as I was checking in my luggage to tell me she’d been able to get her car out with Nova and Juri’s help, which I was happy to hear.

For the Chicago trip, I took along my little book of pictures that shows the journey of the girl and the disappearing journey of the boy. Things started out pretty ugly on the girl side, and it took me quite a while before things started to look decent. I took the pictures along because some of the girls are just starting and they might get intimidated by some of us who are full time. I can remember the beginning of my journey and thinking I could never get to where I am now. But I have, and I still have a little ways to go.

One funny thing that a few of us mentioned was the way we came across on our GP forum postings and the way we appeared in real life. Someone noted that Makenna came across just like her posts, and I had to agree. She was very bubbly and energetic. In fact, most people came across very similar to the way they post on-line. Laura told me I came off a lot different than the way I posted in that I wasn’t as serious as she thought I’d be. She said she’d noticed that I did joke around a bit, but didn’t realize I was that much of a goofball. Yep, I’m a goofball. I like being able to laugh about a lot of different things.

Juri also said I seemed more laid back than my postings. Hmmm….I wonder if I come across too serious sometimes. Perhaps I do on that forum, but I intentionally hold myself back sometimes so I don’t clutter it with useless comedic banter.

To close off this entry, I was finding my way from the Blue Line train to the terminals to check in at O’Hare. On the last escalator up to the check in, I noticed a sign at the very top that simply said “Up” with an arrow above it. As I rode the escalator up, I thought, “Duh. Who would post such a stupid sign like that?” But then I realized that the sign wasn’t for those riding the escalator, it was for those already on that level.

There’s a sign at the top of the escalator I’m riding now. It’s for those that have made it to the top of that last escalator, whatever it may be for each of us. It’s also there for those that are riding all of the other escalators it takes to get there. That sign says “LIVE” and there are an endless amount of gates to depart from to a place called “the rest of my life.” Pssst…pass it on.