Independence Day

From the pages of my written journal

Two hundred and twenty-eight years ago, the U.S. declared its independence from Great Britain. We cut the umbilical chord/leash around our neck. No taxation without representation – we the people – with(out) liberty and justice for all. It was a brave move – a daring move – but one our country needed to make in order for the people to live fulfilling lives. It wasn’t necessarily a choice, but it was something inevitable that had to occur in order for the people to be free – free to live their lives.

I’m tagging along on another journey of independence – Amber's independence. Hers, of course, is still two days away, but like our forefather’s trek, her journey is inevitable in order for her to be who she is. She’s debated that last 5% that questions her decision to have this surgery and if it is necessary, and every time she comes to the same conclusion – she doesn’t see any way to live without having SRS (sex reassignment surgery). I told her that IF she does decide to back out that she would lose no face with me. I’m here for her. And if she decides not to have it, then we’ll just turn it into a relaxing vacation.

We went to Spiderman 2 last night. In the first movie, the message was “with great power comes great responsibility.” In this movie, the general message to me was “we all have dreams, but sometimes we’re not able to pursue those dreams – we just need to be ourselves.” Peter Parker finally came to the conclusion that he WAS Spiderman – he would always be there to fight against evil. His dream was to marry MJ and be this regular guy – to be normal – but he realized he’s Spiderman. I chatted with Amber about the moral of their story – “What part of our life is reality and what part is a dream?” I dream of a normal life without GID, without surgeries to change from one sex to the other, with a family – but, unfortunately, that’s not who I am – I’m Kara. I’m a transsexual. I wish it were the other way around, although it sometimes seems like it, but it’s not. The GID could never allow me to live my life as a man.